A lot of attention is directed towards men and all the mistakes they make when it comes to dating or sweeping a woman off her feet. Guys definitely do deserve a lot of the blame for a first date gone wrong, but in all fairness-what about the ladies? We aren’t perfect, at least not all of the time, and if you find yourself home and depressed about why yet another first date didn’t work out, it’s time to consider the part you played. Here are some common first date mistakes that women make, and how to stop doing them!
We get attached too soon. When a woman gets asked out on a first date by a man she really likes, it can be difficult to keep her imagination from going into overdrive. We start to think about what our second date will be like, what kind of boyfriend he would be, how long we’ll date before we get married and start picking out names for our kids. Whoa now! You haven’t even had dinner together yet. By thinking so far ahead, you’re preventing yourself from enjoying the moment and seeing him for who he truly is. Not too mention that if you admit to him that you’ve named your future children already, you’re going to freak him out completely. So even if you’re thinking it, don’t share it! It’s natural to want to be in love and meet the guy who is the right one, but it takes time to figure out if he’s worth your heart forever-don’t rush it!
We fake it. There is a fine line between getting dressed up for a date versus totally faking who you are or what you look like. If you become so desperate for a man to be interested in you that you have to change who you are, he’s probably not the guy for you in the first place. Don’t dress extra scandalous, or try to fit into a certain mold because you think he might like it. Be who you are, be confident and secure-that is what men find the most attractive-not a short skirt or huge boobs.
We don’t say what we want. Instinctively, women are pleasers-we want care so much about everyone else’s happiness, sometimes at the expense of our own. The best thing about a first date is that it’s your opportunity to lay it all out on the table, or to at least get a feel if the two of you are headed in the same direction. If you’re looking for something serious and long-term, and he mentions casually that he’s not really looking for a girlfriend, it’s time to raise the red flag. This isn’t an invitation to change him either-when a man says what he wants or tells you who he is, believe him, but never sacrifice your own personal needs to satisfy someone else’s. If he isn’t the one for you, it’s ok! Really, it is-there are plenty more fish in the sea.
Remember, an amazing first date takes two people who are on the same page, interested in getting to know each other and love to laugh. I happen to think that last one is the most important…laughter will save you from a multitude of awkward first date moments.
We Love Dates is a worldwide online dating site and dating advice blog.